Have you ever laid in bed letting your thoughts consume you? You move from thought to thought reflecting on every little part of your life… the good and the bad. You reach a point on your trail of thinking that stops you on your tracks… this road block is called your past. Let me guess, you are thinking things along the lines of:
Why did I do that?!
How could I have been so foolish?
I was so immature.
You wish you could go back in time and change your past. But, the reality is we have all been young and reckless. We have all made mistakes. We have all had times where we have said too much, or not enough. We have all let our emotions get to us a little more than they should have. We have all made silly, reckless or even hurtful decisions. Whether it was when you were sixteen or it happened just yesterday, mistakes are bound to happen – intentional or unintentional. These occurrences only prove the obvious… you are a human being (GASP!!!).
Constantly reflecting on your past not only takes a toll on your mental health, but it also prevents you from enjoying the present moment. This blog is dedicated to helping you make the healthy decision to let go of your past and forgive yourself. Keep reading if this coincides with you, if not… that is okay too!
Search for the silver-lining.
I know, you are probably thinking “what is this girl even talking about? How can there be anything positive to come from these mistakes I have made?”, but this is important. Every cloud has a silver lining, so when you are cursing on those clouds for darkening your day, remember that soon enough they will disappear and the sun will shine. Take the time to recognize these mistakes in your past as stepping stones. Take the time to appreciate the good memories surrounded by those decisions. Were these decisions foolish? Likely. Were you young and having fun? Definitely. Use them as lessons for your future self as they have already helped you grow into the person you are today.
Recognize the person you are NOW.
We spend so much time focusing on the person we were in the past and the person we want to become that we forget to appreciate the person we are TODAY! So you made a mistake… did you learn from it?! Yes. Did you find a way to make it right?! Likely. Has it somehow defined the person you are today?! No. My point exactly. Time does it’s thing. People forget. People move on. The person you are now is so much more important than anything you have left behind. Focus on THAT person.
Accept the fact that it is okay to be imperfect.
The fact that you are reflecting on your past decisions proves that you are likely being too hard yourself. In life we can get so caught up on the roads of regret that we forget to stop and enjoy the view. You need to acknowledge that everybody has been in your situation at some point. Nobody is perfect. Everyone makes mistakes. Let go of that regret that you are holding and move forward.
Recognize that the past is meant to stay in the past.
It is okay to recognize the mistakes you have made in the past. It only means that you have morals and values. What I don’t want you to do is to get lost upon reflection and become a castaway on your island of mistakes. Jump on the necessary stepping stones to move forward and let go. Don’t let these decisions define the person you are becoming today.
Show yourself the love that you deserve.
Bringing this negativity into your life is only limiting you from the love that you can give to yourself. Show yourself the kindness and love that you share so freely with others. Talk to yourself as if you were talking to your loved ones and peers. Give yourself that same love and respect to those who have likely made the same or similar mistakes as you by replacing those negative notions with positive affirmations.
Mistakes are a part of being a human being. Its a part of this journey we are all on called life. Cut yourself some slack. You are doing the best you can. Each day we grow and learn. You are not the person you were years ago, a month ago, or even yesterday. At some point you need to learn to let go and turn the page to a better chapter.
And remember, love yourself.Tara McCance, Living Completely.